My life is… My home is…

You may remember the ads a few years ago that read, “My life is San Francisco, my home is Parkmerced.”

Live Large at ParkmercedAdvertisers aren’t know for telling the truth, and this is no exception; the ads seem to be implying that Parkmerced is part of San Francisco, which while technically true, is at the same time an assertion most San Franciscans would find somewhat dubious.

If they wanted to be honest, the ad would be like one of the following:

  • My life is waiting 45 minutes for the M Oceanview, my home is Parkmerced
  • My life is SFSU and smoking weed, my home is Parkmerced
  • My life is getting lost in traffic circles, my home is Parkmerced

But why stop there? Other neighborhoods would have much more interesting ads than Parkmerced.

North Beach

  • My life is listening to drunk idiots who think they’re beatnik poets, my home is North Beach
  • My life is being invaded by the Chinese, my home is North Beach

Union Square

  • My life is your art school, my home is Union Square
  • My life is being accosted by hobos, my home is Union Square
  • My life is crass commercialism, my home is Union Square

The Marina

  • My life is SoCal, my home is the Marina
  • My life is arrogance, my home is the Marina

The Mission

  • My life is a non-profit arts collective, my home is the Mission
  • My life is crack, my home is the Mission
  • Mi vida es gringos aburguesado mi barrio, mi casa es la Misión

SOMA

  • My life is work, my home is SOMA
  • My life is other people’s commutes, my home is SOMA

Bayview

  • My life is going to be short, my home is the Bayview
  • My life is gang-related, my home is the Baview

The Castro

  • My life is focused entirely on my sexuality, my home is The Castro

Fisherman’s Wharf

  • My life sucks, my home is Fisherman’s Wharf